A Time to Mourn

If you would have told me this morning that I would write two blog posts today, I would have thought you were nuts (here's the other one).  But, you would have been right.  Anyway…

“Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.”

~Romans 12:15

I knew today would be different the moment I walked into church.  We were late, and we walked into the side door as the church was singing “How Great Thou Art” in Kikaonde, the local language.  This hymn has been a favorite of mine for as far back as I can remember.  When singing the refrain, I feel as though my soul really is singing.  So even though I did not understand the language in which they were singing, I sang along in English.

But this hymn is more to me than my soul’s song to God.  It reminds me of my grandmother who passed away in 2005.  It has been 5 and a half years since she passed, but sometimes it feels like just yesterday.  At her funeral, we recessed to the choir singing “How Great Thou Art,” and now I can’t hear that song without thinking of her.  I praise God that she knew Him, but sometimes the pain of missing her comes, and I can’t help but pause and cry.

This isn’t the only song that does this to me, either.  Another favorite of mine – “Here I Am Lord” – has taken on multiple layers of emotion as well.  It is a song representative of our call into the mission field.  It has been a favorite of Tiffany’s for longer than I’ve known her.  In fact, she processed to it at our wedding.  But our wedding would not be the last time she processed to this song.

My cousin Michael was killed by a train in September of last year.  I posted a blog about it back in the fall, but the hole is still there.  At his funeral, the family processed into the sanctuary to “Here I Am Lord.”  Although I have not heard this song today, or even recently, I am daily led to prayer for my family as I have a memorial card for Michael serving as a bookmark in my Bible for my daily devotions.

So, why am I getting emotional about Grandma and Michael today?  Because I received an email this afternoon from my best friend.  His paternal grandfather passed away on Friday.  And so I am mourning with him, just as he mourned with me when I lost my grandmother and my cousin.  My heart goes out to him and his family as they look to God to comfort them during this time (which He promises to do; see Matthew 5:4).  The pain will be real, but so is the comfort they have in knowing that Grandpa Allen is with Christ in heaven.

Our prayers are with you, Allen family.  Please know that, though we cannot be with you during this time, we love you dearly and are with you in spirit.  May God wrap His arms around you, holding you close and reminding you that He is ALWAYS there.  Always.