When God Spins You 'Round

Do you ever take life for granted? You know what I'm talking about. You stop looking at everything you have as a great gift from God, but rather as a given that you deserve. No longer is your job a blessing, but a drudgery that you have to go to every day. What was once a vibrant relationship with the Creator has become an understanding that He is there, but only as much as you want Him to be.

I was going through a time like that. I finished my last seminary class last Friday, and since all of my work was turned in before that, when I left campus, I was officially done with seminary. I was proud of myself, and ready to go out and do what I wanted to do. I didn't see my training as a blessing of God preparing me for the ministry and life He has planned for me; I saw it as a step in the path that lead me to where I wanted to go.

So I went about my life how I wanted to. And that's when God decided to give my life a spin.

Literally.

I was driving to work at about 3 on Monday afternoon. Driving in Dallas is always an experience, but this particular trip would prove to be the most memorable. As I came off an exit ramp and looked to merge left, a car flew up on my left side, pulls directly in front of me (where there really wasn't room), and then slams on the brakes. With nothing else to do, I tried to get into the now empty lane to my left, but had to slam on my brakes so as not to crash into the (really expensive) car directly in front of me. The combination of turning my wheel, hitting the brakes, and borderline frozen pavement sent me spinning. My car started spinning to the right while traveling to the left before my wheels caught (I was steering in the direction of the skid). I immediately started spinning left and traveling back in the direction I came from (and then some). I spun two and a half rotations traveling right across three lanes of traffic, then another quarter turn back before coming to a gentle stop on the shoulder, safely between some construction cones and a few yards from a flashing construction sign.

Pretty frightening, right?

But get this - I didn't hit anything. No cars smashed into me. Never hit a guard rail. Never hit a traffic cone. Didn't blow a tire. No injuries. Nothing.

Did I mention it was 3 PM, the beginning of Dallas rush hour? I was by no means the only car on the road, yet I never hit or got hit by anything.

All at once I realized two things. First, I realized that God has plans for me that did not include me getting killed on Monday. Second, they are God's plans, and they are a blessing to be a part of, so I need to live my life accordingly, giving credit where it is due and seeking to glorify Him in all that I do.

As I realize that there is no other reason for me to be alive and healthy today than God's provision and protection, I wonder if maybe you are taking life for granted as well. Maybe you feel as though you are going through the motions of life, not really having much purpose in what you are doing. Now would be a great time to turn to the Father who loves you and dedicate your life to serving Him. Otherwise He may use other means to get your attention. And sometimes that doesn't feel so good...but serving the Lord brings a greater joy than we can ever imagine.

Smiles for the Season

I woke up this morning after a 12-hour turkey coma to the sound of rain pattering on the window sill. It took a moment before I realized that it was on the inside of the window, since our windows leak from the top and make a nice puddle on the floor. I rolled out of bed and put on the hoodie conveniently located on the floor next to me. My eyes adjusted as I looked at the bedroom clock, did some quick math to subtract 23 minutes from the time shown to determine that it was 8 in the morning. I thought about all of the sales that I had already missed by "sleeping in" until 8 and realized that I really didn't care. I went into the living room and did my quiet time, then decided it was time to go to the gym, so I walk outside into the frigid 50-degree air and took a deep breath. Well, actually it was more of a half breath, as the air in Dallas is not really the cleanest air in the world. Anyway, I took the half breath and a cough and thought to myself, "Christmas is in the air." And I couldn't do anything but smile.

So it's the night after Thanksgiving, and I'm sitting on the couch in our living room unable to see Laura through the Christmas tree we just put up. Tiff and Laura are at the bistro table painting little pumpkins (leftover from Halloween almost a month ago) to look like Santa and snowmen. I'm supposed to be writing a paper, but I'm not really wanting to. So here I am, taking in the moment and enjoying the fact that less than one month from today we will gather together with Christians around the world praising God as we remember and celebrate the birth of our Savior.

And that's exciting...and why I can't do anything but smile.

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Now playing: Chris Rice - Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing
via FoxyTunes

Where is our hope?

Two weeks off from school is never really easy for me. It's not that I so enjoy spending hours reading and doing homework and these two weeks cramp my style, but more that I don't know what to do with myself with all this free time. On past breaks, I've spent endless hours watching movies, but our DVD player recently tanked and that option has gone out the window. So now I find myself sitting in front of our TV watching bad daytime shows and wondering what to do with myself.

Like today. After sleeping till almost 9, I got up, showered and shaved and got ready for another day of sitting around until work this afternoon. At 11 I turned on the Bonnie Hunt Show, not so much because I really like it but more because it's something to watch that's not a Soap. While it was on I began reading and didn't realize that Bonnie was over and Martha Stewart had started. When I lifted my eyes, I saw Martha talking with Tom Brokaw, and I was intrigued by the conversation. Not that I should have been surprised, but they were discussing the "wonderful" events of the recent presidential election. During this conversation, Brokaw stated that Obama exemplifies the hope of our country, both personally and ideologically. I couldn't help but be bothered by this comment for a number of reasons.

First, that is a lot of pressure to place on a single human being. Sure, he ran on a platform promising hope for America, but now that he has been elected, the whole country is counting on him to make positive changes for us and future generations. The problem is that, being merely human, he is going to let us down at some point in some way. Probably more often than not. Yet so many in America, and across the world, are placing all their hope in this one man. And that, to me, is frightening.

And horribly sad.

No single individual can meet the all the expectations we put on them, especially if we are placing our hope on them to better our future. And not just our temporal future. There is an eternal future that must be of greater concern to us, and there is only one source of hope for this future - Jesus Christ. God has promised that all who trust in His Son for the forgiveness of sins will live with Him in eternity, but those who do not trust in His Son will be forever separated from Him, living for eternity in the torment of being separated from love and good.

Now, there are some who do not believe in eternity after this life. They view death as an annihilation of our being, and therefore there is no reason to look to anything beyond this life. They argue that we must therefore make the best of this life and enjoy it while we can, because once we're dead, we're dead. Yet this view has no hope, and living without hope is not living at all. Though I agree that we only have one life as we know it, the life that comes from Christ is one that will never end, and it is one that is spent in the eternal beauty and love of the Father who made us and loves us dearly.

And that is a life worth hoping in.

So as we look to our newly-elected president as the hope for the future of our country, may this not be the end of our hope. Let us join together with the hymn writer in declaring that "My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness."





And I'm so sorry if this entry doesn't make sense. My mind was moving faster than my hands...

Morning Devotion

How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked,

Nor stand in the path of sinners,

Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!

But his delight is in the law of the Lord,

And in his law he meditates day and night.

He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water,

Which yields its fruit in its season

And its leaf does not wither;

And in whatever he does, he prospers.

The wicked are not so,

But they are like chaff which the wind drives away.

Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,

Nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

For the Lord knows the way of the righteous,

But the way of the wicked will perish.

~Psalm 1

It frightens me to think that I may fit in the category of the wicked in this psalm, but I do not seem to fit the description of the blessed righteous man. Sure, I consider the word both day and night, but right now that's because of my homework assignments, not because of a desire for a greater understanding of, and deeper relationship with, God.

I overheard a conversation in the student center on campus several weeks ago that struck me as sadly true, yet I seem to have done nothing about it in my life. These individuals were talking about their relationship with God pre-seminary versus their current situation. It seems many of us are in the same boat: when we come in, we are in a close relationship with God, but as we continue in our schooling, that relationship gets pushed further to the side as increased demands on our time and energy come from schoolwork, jobs, family, church commitments, internships, etc. We get so wrapped up in what needs to get done now that we neglect what is important in eternity – our relationship with God.

I am in need of a priority shift. Are you? Do you push your relationship with God to the side under the pressure of other parts of your life? Do you feel that your relationship with God is not what it used to be? If so, join me as we return our focus to the One who deserves our attention and praise.

PRAYER:

"Lord, you alone deserve all my attention and praise. You alone are due the glory I seek to place elsewhere, even on myself. Forgive me for the way I push you to the side, for you should be the focus and center of my life. Teach me to look to you first in all I do, and guide me to a restored relationship with you. Refine me, O Lord, that I may be used by you. In Jesus' name, amen."

Arriving Soon in Your Mailbox...

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The Election

I'm not really into politics. I never have been. So I'm not really caught up on all the issues that are being discussed. I mean, I know enough to get by, and I realize there's talk about the wars, and about the economy, and all that stuff. I get that. But I don't consider myself well-read in any of these areas. Not that most Americans are...though we may think we are.

But I do know that this is all a bit ridiculous to me. I mean, are these two men really the best this country has to offer as choices for the next leaders of America? Seriously. We can't do any better than this? We as a country keep yelling about how bad George W. is, and how badly we need change, and we've chosen McCain and Obama as our top two possibilities for bringing about positive change? Can we not do any better?

On the one side, we have a great war veteran who has survived great brutality as a prisoner of war and has served many, many, many years in the Senate, yet he seems so old and robotic that nobody would ever like him. And since we are all about appearances and how likable somebody is, the idea of seeing boring old McCain lead the country makes many people quiver.

Then there's Obama. Full of charisma. Willing to say whatever he can to make the people happy. Lacking any real experience at all, but hey, that's okay, because he seems to be a good guy, right? I mean, who cares if he has shown favor for partial-birth abortions and that he is in the Senate because he ran essentially unopposed in Illinois. Who cares that he thinks the best thing we can do is take all of our troops out of Iraq at once, thereby leaving a mess of a situation and making the US a sitting duck for widespread hostility. Who cares, cuz he sure seems nice.

With the election only weeks away, I acknowledge that I need to exercise my right to vote. I get that. But I would love to be able to write in somebody like my mother, who I am sure would do a better job than McCain or Obama ever could. I could write in Tiffany, but she's not old enough yet. I could write in my father-in-law...I don't agree with his morals, but he seems to care enough about people. I can think of a number of people who would do infinitely better as the president of the United States than either of these two men. Yet this is what we've been given, and though it is less than ideal, may God's will be done. I am confident that God is in control and that He will work through whoever gets into office. And God's will may not be our will, but it is for the expansion of His glory. So regardless of who are choices are and who ultimately takes office, may God be praised as we look to begin yet another chapter in the story of this country.

It's....October?

What happened to September? It was here the other day...

But it's now October, which means a lot. It means that the weather is "changing" (highs are in the 80s now). It means that millions of people are flocking to Dallas for the state fair. It means that candy corn is more easily found in the grocery store. And it means that the semester is halfway over.

My last semester...halfway over.

Am I really this close to be being done? It seems like only yesterday I started, but soon I'll put away those books and pens (For all those Saved By The Bell fans out there). In two months, my last papers are due and my last exams will be taken, then I'll be done. I'll be given a piece of paper that says that I am qualified to go and teach God's Word to people of other nations.

Yet I feel so unbelievably unqualified. I'm not ready to carry this responsibility. But I know that God has other plans than I do. I know that He will give me the ability to do His will, regardless of how I feel or what a little piece of paper says. So I must learn to rely on Him, not my education.

And those are my thoughts this morning.

Goin' to a Wedding

I'm getting a sister. I am the last of "the Wessler boys" to get a sister, as I was the first one married. But now, I get a sister. And Tiffany gets a sister. And that sister's name is Heidi....though I've never seen her in pig tails.

Not that a single person reading this blog (of the four of you I know who have read it) cares that I'm getting a sister, this is a big deal in my life. At my wedding, all of my brothers (except Zach...he doesn't say much) commented on how great it was to get a sister, and how happy they were that it is Tiffany. Growing up, we were five brothers without any sisters, and everybody knew it. When Zach was born, people would say that we made a basketball team. We actually did make a basketball team one summer for the Gus Macker 3-on-3 tournament in Peoria, which was really interesting because it was the 3 oldest boys plus Dad, making us play against all these old people when I was in Jr. High. And if you've ever seen me play basketball, you can only guess how intimidating that was for me. All that to say we've always looked forward to getting a sister. So, at my wedding, my brothers were all excited because they finally got a sister.

And I got a wife. :)

But, I still don't have a sister. But all that's going to change. We are packed and ready to fly up to St. Louis, then drive to Peoria because Nate is getting married tomorrow. Granted, they should have gotten married before I did, but they took their time. And we can't change the past. So now they're getting married. And we're excited.

I'm finally getting sister.

Salvation by…works?

Okay, so I don't want to step on any toes here, but this entry is based off a conversation I had with James while talking outside the bathroom on the second floor of the library. If you were in the library at the time, you probably heard us as neither one of us is particularly quiet. Anyway, somehow we got around to talking about evangelism and the way it is taught in many (most?) evangelical churches today. This goes along with a previous entry, as we agreed that we should not go out and evangelize because we are told to do so by others. We brought up the fact that, at DTS, we have to share the gospel with at least 5 people during the semester in which we are taking evangelism. Granted, we should be doing this anyway, but our emphasis was on the requirement aspect of it. But it's not just at DTS. James said he had looked at other seminaries but decided not to go there because the students were required to share the gospel with at least 2 people every week while a student at that seminary. Again, sharing the gospel is a good thing. Requiring it as part of a grade or even as part of being eligible to remain a student places the emphasis in the wrong place. Evangelism should flow from our worship of the King. If we truly love Him, our life will reflect this love and we can do little but share the gospel with others (though this need not be done by reciting the "4 Spiritual Laws" or, if at DTS, the "Bad News, Good News").

This conversation led into a discussion of the methods used to reach the lost. Being raised Lutheran, the concept of an altar call was completely foreign to me until I started visiting Baptist and Assemblies of God churches. Though I have no problem with the concept of an altar call – I believe that making a physical expression of one's faith is great – I take issue at those who believe that altar calls are necessary for Christians to participate in, or, even worse, necessary for salvation. Last I checked salvation is given by God as a gift. A gift granted by grace, through faith, but a gift nonetheless. And this is not by works. That means that no altar call is necessary for salvation, no matter how many preaches may make it seem otherwise.

And these altar calls may not be merely those found at the end of many church services. They are the common means by which many Western evangelists finish their presentations. Think about it. How many times have we heard somebody share the gospel and finish by saying, "If you believe what I said just now, then pray this simple prayer and you will be saved." The requirement of "praying the prayer" takes the place of the altar call, placing the emphasis not on the One who saves but on man's ability to do something to get salvation.

I'll let the sit for a second.

 

 

Just think about it. By saying that they must "pray this prayer" we are adding a requirement to salvation that was not put there by God. Yes, it makes sense to our finite, human minds to add something to the gospel presentation so that we may be assured that somebody is saved, but this does not make it a requirement for salvation. If somebody does not "pray the prayer," they may still be saved…we just might not know it. And that's okay. We don't need to know. If we require the prayer, or even present it as a requirement, we are adding a condition to salvation and, all of a sudden, salvation is by works. No matter how often we preach otherwise, as long as we make the altar call or the prayer a necessary component of our gospel presentations, we are preaching a works-based salvation in practice. And that, my brothers and sisters, is not the gospel.

I could keep going, but I need to get to class. I'm thinking I am long overdue for an entry on baptism…and since that ties in very nicely with this one, I very well may hit on that topic next time.

A Simple Question.

"If the Missio Dei is the central story of Scripture, why is it missing from our theology?"

This is another sound bite from class. No, it's not really a "simple" question. But still, it's one that every Christian should consider. Now, I guess I can't assume everybody would know what it is I'm talking about, so I'll give a little background. I mean, y'all aren't in class with me everyday.

Basically, the "Missio Dei" is, literally, the mission of God.

It is not merely something He does – it is the very nature of God. It is His interaction with humanity. It exudes from His being. It is the extension of His love to all people everywhere.

It is found in every page of the Bible. From beginning to end, God seeks to be glorified by making Himself known to all humanity.

And He has made Himself known. Every human who has ever lived has been given evidence of God's very existence through their surroundings. The other people, the animals, the plants, the stars, the sun, even the air we breathe show evidence of God's existence. We are all therefore without excuse. We cannot deny His existence. Yet that is not enough. General revelation (God's revealing Himself to all mankind through nature, etc.) makes every person, regardless of location or background, accountable to God. But just because we have all been given evidence of God does not mean that we have all been given the revelation necessary for salvation – the revelation of God's mercy and the sacrifice of Jesus Christ for our sins.

The responsibility of those who have been given this revelation, then, is to share with anybody and everybody. But this isn't a duty in the sense of the drudgery associated with work. Rather, it's an opportunity to respond in love and praise to the God who has called us to Him. Just as the Missio Dei is the nature of God and therefore it exudes from Him, so too we, as people seeking after the heart of God, should exude His love in all that we do. To participate in mission is to participate in God's love toward all people, everywhere. What a great opportunity! Yet so often we make missions an activity of the church, not the central pole on which all the aspects of ministry base. If missions is the central theme of who God is and how He has interacted with mankind throughout history, we, as the representatives of Christ on earth, should likewise make missions the central theme of who we are and what we do, both as individuals and as the church.

Hopefully I will be able to further develop this idea in future entries….so stay tuned.

The Church and the Ice Cream Cone

"The bigger a church gets, the more prone it is to becoming a self-licking ice cream cone"

My "Theology of Missions" professor made this comment during class this past week, and the entire class – all twelve of us – laughed pretty heartily before we considered the gravity of what was said. Although it doesn't necessarily summarize my first week of my last semester of Seminary, it does provide a good topic for consideration. I'll start with a little bit of the context in which the comment was made.

Our class discussion for this particular session was on the nature and extent of sin. It's a topic that pretty much all of my professors have addressed at some point, but most of them do it using the theological language of the seminary classroom. This professor insisted that we not use any seminary language, but talk as though we were explaining sin to a ten-year-old. As we continued in the discussion, we began to consider how our perspective on sin will affect those to whom we are ministering. If we have a lax view of sin – portraying sin as a simple error that can be fixed and forgotten – we will never show it for what it really is – a constant rejection of the dominion of the Divine. As sin continues in our lives, it shows those to whom we minister that it is okay to reject God's authority. It's like leading them directly into the ground without them even realizing it. Dr. Bradley used the illustration of performance fighter plane fliers who followed each other so closely in formation that when the leader performed a loop too close to the ground, all the others followed suit and all of the men ended up crashing into the ground. Likewise, a view of sin that is too light will not only lead us into further rebellion, but it will also lead all those who follow us.

And that's when the quote came out. We got onto the topic of how some churches avoid teaching about the truth of sin, preferring instead to emphasize God's love. I'm not going to name any names, but some of the largest churches in the country avoid talking honestly about sin so that the members can feel good about themselves. The message they hear appeals to them, but it doesn't convict them. These churches begin to grow without addressing the real issue at hand. And, as these churches continue to grow, the avoidance of the sin issue is reinforced because the numbers are increasing, and, according to the Western mentality, the more members a church has, the more successful it must be. They truly become a self-licking ice cream cone.

Sin is not always an easy issue to talk about. Most people don't like to hear how bad we are. Yet we must be willing to address this issue if we are going to be honest about God's Truth. Just remember, we will never fully appreciate what God has done for us if we do not rightly understand what God has saved us from. Sin is utterly, absolutely hideous every time it occurs, and we should never sugar coat this truth. But we can add hope to this message as we remember the hope we have in Christ.

Preparing for the madness

Okay, the title is a little bit of an exaggeration, but in less than a week we will regret poor use of free time and underutilization of time together over the summer. That's right, the fall semester begins next week. And not just any semester- our last semester (if anyone has ever been the spouse of a seminary student, you realize that getting through truly is a joint effort - hence the "our"). Along with classes, stacks of books, and assignments that keep Luke up until all hours of the night (which he's getting used to as he's stayed up watching the olympics every night for the past two weeks), the new semester brings new work schedules and other commitments.

Luke just started a new job coaching at a cheerleading gym. Since the kids are in school all day, practices run late afternoon-evening. He won't be getting home quite as late as he did when working at Starbucks, but it still basically kills our opportunity to enjoy dinner together four of the seven days of the week. Not to say I don't have my own changes and commitments on the horizon. Starting next Tuesday, I'll be taking the Perspectives class, a missions-oriented course on the world Christian movement. Additionally, FCA at the local high school should kick in on Thursday nights soon, and a new college semester means additional flyers, newsletters and other pieces will need to be created for Kappa Phi. Between committees, the deacon's board, youth activities and services based on African time, church rounds out our list of activities that will surely leave us longing for the less-intense days of summer.

We did take the opportunity to get a little time together - enjoying God's creation - this past weekend. Canoeing down the Brazos River on Saturday in beautiful 85-degree weather (NOT common in Dallas in August), followed by Chinese takeout and a movie, and a relaxing day together on Sunday ending with grilling out in a nearby park, was a great way to do what we could to try to memorize each other's features so as not to forget what the other looks like when our schedules have us all over the metroplex but never in the same place at the same time.

On another note (I realize this is getting kind of random), we are praying and preparing for a potential trip to Zambia in March with SIM, and are continuing through the steps for full-time missions with the organization.

Which gets to the scary part. We came to Dallas so Luke could attend seminary and we could move to Africa. We had created a 'list' of necessary steps in order to enter into full-time missions. 1. Graduate seminary (coming in December); 2. pay off all debt (done in June); 3. Find an organization and go through the application process (in progress); and 4. Get assignment and raise support.

All of a sudden this Africa thing is becoming real!!!

Once a distant thought, it is now a plan-evoking reality. So not only are we starting another semester... it's our last semester... meaning it is only a matter of time before our lives turn from our daily commitments and routines to fundraising, packing, and preparing for God's great adventure for us halfway around the world...

Our Summer Letter

If you didn't get our most recent update letter, here it is! Click on the image for a larger, easier-to-read version.

(If you want to receive future support letters via mail or e-mail, please let us know)

Just some thoughts on the Olympics...

So, my dad has been a sports journalist for basically an eternity now, but since he prefers to work in the small market newspapers, he doesn't get to travel to the Olympics....though many people have been asking me about that lately. He does, however, have many friends who do travel over there, and he's pretty well informed about what's going on. He wrote on his blog a week or two ago about how China was trying to control what the world-wide media says and does during the Olympics. I'll let you go to his blog yourself....and enjoy what you read. He's a much better writer than I am.

On another note, since the opening ceremonies on Friday night and all their extravagance, I have been completely plastered to my television set. I only get NBC, and that comes in and out depending on the location of the rabbit ears on our set, but they cover the headline sports, which for the Olympics that's really all I care about. And being a former gymnast, swimmer, and diver, these past few days have been intense. Men's and women's qualifying in gymnastics, the men's finals last night with the US taking a surprising bronze (much better than that sixth place I and many others predicted), the synchronized diving domination by the Chinese, and the gills of the US swim team have all kept my eyes glued to the small 19" screen. Perhaps the greatest two moments of the Olympics so far have been the US men getting third in gymnastics last night (behind China and Japan, surprise, surprise) and Jason Lezak coming from behind and touching out France for the gold in the 400 Free Relay on Sunday night. Being the child of my father, I love to yell at the television and tell the athletes how I feel about the performance. However, as Tiffany goes to bed at about 8:30 or 9:00, I had to hold it in, as both of these spectacular events took place after 10:00. So instead I just pumped my fists in the air and pretended to yell.

Next up on my agenda: watch the US women's gymnastics team do what it does best...crumble under Olympic pressure. We got a taste of it the other day when Alicia Sacramone decided to tumble completely off the floor, Nastia Liukin took a seat as she dismounted from bars, and Chelsie Memmel looked like she just didn't want to hang onto the bar anymore. I'm starting to have flashbacks of the 92 games when Kim Zmeskel and company were slated to dominate and all they did was drop the ball. But we'll see.

The Video of My Sermon, Part the Last

Finally...part 5. Much shorter than the others, but the way the video divided itself, this is what I was left with.



Part 5 of 5

The Video of My Sermon, Part 4

Here's part 4...I realize now that you'll have to start at the bottom and work your way up. Sorry. You could go from the top down and treat my sermon like you're watching "Memento."



Part 4 of 5

The Video of My Sermon, Part 3

Here's part 3...only 2 more after this one...



Part 3 of 5

The Video of My Sermon, Part 2

And, here's part 2....man it takes a long time for these suckers to upload....Maybe next time I'll do a 20-minute Lutheran sermon instead of this 45-minute African Baptist business...



Part 2 of 5

The Video of My Sermon, Part 1

Seeing as how Tiffany thought I should actually post the video of my sermon from June, I have spent the last few days trying to figure out how to get the video onto my computer and then post it onto the blog. I'm hoping I can get it all on here. I'd also like to apologize in advance for any motion sickness one may suffer from watching the video....Tiff's arm got tired a few times and she'd adjust. And please be nice. I didn't really know what I was doing...


Part 1 of 5

My Resume - what is it worth?

So part of the process of applying for full-time missions with SIM is filling out a doctrinal assessment (I'll get to that in a minute) and a training evaluation. You fill in boxes on all the different Bible and missions courses you have taken, along with related transcripts - a resume of sorts.

Don't get me wrong, I've got this resume thing down... shifting from Journalism to PR to Marketing Communications to Internet Marketing and now to a combination of basically all of the above, I've got my bases covered. So that will get me a job in marketing, but what about in missions?

Granted, Bible studies galore, serving in our church in so many ways that we've basically given up on the concept of weekends, Sunday school lessons, and weekly sermons have all taught me so much about God's word and pushed me to try to be more like Jesus, but I couldn't fill in a single box on the sheet for 'formalized training.' Isn't experience what matters? That's what I have on my resume - I'm past the 'relevant coursework' and rely on 'work experience' instead. But it leaves me to ponder... am I equipped? We've spent the past two years and lots of money putting Luke through seminary and I'm convinced he knows the Bible front to back. Me? I thought I had a pretty good understanding, and that the 'experience' thing would be great, but there was also a doctrinal assessment.

Doctrinal assessment just sounds intimidating. It would have been better had they called it: "What you believe." We filled out the basic version on our initial application, but this was a little longer, a little more insightful, and they limited you to four sentences per answer. Being a writer, I'm really good at really long answers that sound good but may not exactly hit the target of the question. Now I have to answer deep theological questions and am limited to a few lines of text. Oy. All I have to say is that if they deem us unfit for missions or decide I spoke pure heresy, I apologize to Luke and all those who were excited to support us and pray for us as we set off. Okay, it wasn't that bad, and the questions asking me to apply my faith to a variety of cultural questions were actually kind of fun to answer after I stewed on them and avoided them until the last possible minute. Plus, it was good to really think about what I believe, and not just what I've been fed to believe. It's just that the whole process is intimidating - that at each step someone is going to tell me we can't go because I'm unfit for missions because this isn't just writing a good story and hoping it affects someone. This is telling THE GOOD STORY and praying that someone will make a choice between eternal life or eternal punishment.

I guess where I'm going with this is that with all the "successes" I've had in things of this world and all the praise I've received for various gifts and strengths, this is one area where, *shock,* my sufficiency comes only from the Lord. That's kind of freeing - seeing as I definitely don't feel sufficient. This is one test I can't ace by any effort of my own. I can't rely on charm, intelligence, or my resume. Our work in missions will not be our work, but the Spirit of the Lord working through us to bring Him the glory. Praise God!

Because I definitely couldn't do it without him...

Disciplinary Action

Oh, the spiritual disciplines. I remember reading a book about them for school a couple years ago. "The Spirit of the Disciplines," by Dallas Willard. I remember enjoying that book. I remember the assignment of practicing at least one discipline for a period of time to be enjoyable and educational. I actually continued with this discipline for some time after the class ended. Then life happened, and it all changed.

But first, a flashback...

Going back to college, I remember having to be extremely structured with my time. Being on the swim team my freshman year, I would be in class all day, go to practice in the middle of the afternoon, go straight to work, go to some Christian event on campus (between prayer meetings, CRU gatherings, and worship, I had something every night of the week), then go home, do homework, do my quiet time, and go to bed. Every day. Very structured. Yet very disciplined. I always did my quiet time, and when I did, I always read one chapter from an O.T. book of history, five psalms, one proverb, one chapter from the prophets, one chapter from a Gospel, and one chapter from an epistle. Then I would journal, usually for about half an hour or so. Then I would pray. Very, very disciplined. And I grew a lot during that time. Then life happened, and things changed. The swim team got cut, and I became a cheerleader, which was more work and different practice times. My whole schedule changed, and all of a sudden I didn't have the freetime at night to do my quiet times anymore. I tried getting up early in the morning to do them, but 4 am is really early for a college student, and that didn't work. I tried to do them in the middle of the day, but I would fall asleep. It never occurred to me to stop some of my other activities to give some time for God...a lesson I didn't learn for many more years and that I continue to struggle with now.

So here I am, out of college for over three years, looking to finish up seminary in about four months, and considering what God has planned for Tiffany and myself in regards to full-time ministry overseas. Yet I still have a hard time devoting time to God. It's been bothering me for a while, and I keep saying that I'm going to do something about it, but then I don't. I'd much rather putz around and do nothing. But Tuesday night, when I was unable to sleep for hours on end, I had a little discussion time with God. You know how sometimes you pray for unimportant things and God turns you around so you look at the important things, instead. I was praying that I could become more disciplined and start working out more, as I have been frustrated with the irregularity of my workouts. So, as I'm praying this, I feel deeply convicted that I'm not disciplined in my time with God, so how could I ask to be disciplined in my time elsewhere. I needed to get my priorities straight and refocus on the things that matter. So I've taken action on this issue with the hopes of becoming more disciplined in my time with God. I've devoted time every morning (well, Wednesday and today...I don't know what happened yesterday...) to reading God's word, praying, and even journaling (well, I really only journaled on Wednesday....but there's still time today). Though it's only been a few days, I feel like my whole life is getting back into some sort of structure, all because I've made the effort to focus on God regularly and let other things get pushed to the side until He gets my focus. I took some disciplinary action, and it has really made a difference and encouraged me to continue in this discipline.

Updates and Such

Tiff and I have written an update letter that we're sending out in the next few days to over 100 "lucky" recipients. These letters basically sum up all that has happened during the last 7 months of our lives. They're nothing special, but people have been asking and so we're letting them know. We're also working on our support letters which will go out in late August or early September regarding our trip to Zambia. All that just to say that I am in the process of adding Tiffany to this blog so that she can write on here, too. I'm hoping that I'll be able to keep up with her, as I get this feeling that she's going to end up posting more than me. But, allowing her to write might inspire me to write more, and when I do write to actually make it meaningful (though the more random, stupid ones are sometimes more fun).

Let's get ready for some changes around here...

The Heat Is On...and On...and On

It is hot. Still. Day number 18 or something of over 100. We're looking forward to a few days from now when the cold front moves through and takes us down to about 99 or so. Woohoo!

That said, when it's this hot I don't want to do anything. So I'm not. I have the week off, so I don't have to worry about dealing with a bunch of people when I'm in a bad mood. And that's a good thing.

I have, however, gotten out the game cube that I've had since college, and it looks like I may actually beat The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time...finally. Three years later. But even this is done in short spurts, since sitting in one place for extended periods of time makes me sweat profusely in the sauna that is our living room. All this to say that I am really, really good at wasting my time. I'm even better at wasting my time when it's like 8 billion degrees outside. I say I'm gonna read, but I don't. I say I'm gonna get ahead in my homework, but I don't. I say I'm gonna go to the gym and workout, but the idea of willingly making myself sweat even more makes me almost sick to my stomach.

Midwest, I miss you.

Burning and Barfing

Sometimes it's nice to have a day off from work. With the final swim meet of the summer happening last night, I actually got to sleep in this morning. I also didn't have to teach swimming lessons today, so I had a full day off with nothing planned. That said, I've had a number of errands I've been meaning to run for the past few weeks. One of these errands was to take Yoda in for her yearly vaccinations.

Taking Yoda to the vet is always a fun and exciting event. Today was definitely no exception. There's nothing quite like braving the 102 degree heat of July in Dallas to drive a crying cat to somebody who is going to stick her with sharp objects. So I got her there, and she got the shots, and all was good. Or so we thought. I get her home, and about an hour later I hear a deep meow followed by the undeniable sound of barfing. I go and find her next to a mound of cat chunks. I went to clean that up, and she barfed again. The next 45 minutes were spent cleaning up no less than 10 barfs in 4 rooms in our apartment. And all this before lunch. Yummy.

So, I call the vet and he has me bring her back in for the afternoon so he could give her some more medicine and keep an eye on her. Lucky for me, Yoda was more passive as I tried to get her in her carrier, so that was easier, which was good, since my car's interior was probably close to 200 degrees. So, I went back into the crazy heat of Dallas and got Yoda back to the vet. And there goes the excitement of the day. Yoda is now back home and perfectly fine. Life is back to normal. And I'm watching "Wipeout" and laughing up a storm. There's something about people completely busting themselves that makes me laugh. I am so glad God gave us all the gift of laughter.

Randomness of life

Sometimes things happen in life that we just can't make up. Like when I was watching the news this morning and they kept showing a video of a guy who drove his truck (which was pulling some huge trailer behind it) in to a drive-thru banking area and hit the awning, and the whole cement awning fell on the trailer and the truck. The guy was fine, but they showed this video at least 15 times in 5 minutes. Crazy. And that was just the start of the day.

I normally show up at the UP Pool at 6:30 in the morning on days where we have practice. We use this time to set up and wake up before the kids show up at 7. Well today Alex and I walk on the deck and there are nasty Dallas birds everywhere. Hundreds of them. More than I have ever seen at this pool before. Then we look in the water and see something floating. Our hearts initially dropped into our stomachs as we thought maybe, somehow, a small child had gotten in the pool overnight. To our surprise, it was not a baby (woohoo!), but a dead armadillo. That's right. An armadillo. In the middle of Dallas. Dead. In a pool. Floating. Needless to say we canceled practice. But the question of the hour is, How did it get there? Armadillos aren't really known for being terribly flexible, and there aren't really any openings in the fence big enough for this thing to crawl through. It also seemed to be missing its head, but that could be from the birds. Furthermore, I never thought armadillos to be indigenous to the Dallas area. So I think we came to the conclusion that somebody must have thrown it over the fence as some sort of joke. But however it got there, we found a dead armadillo in the UP Pool. I am SO glad the season is basically over and I don't have to get in that pool ever again.


At least I learned that armadillos can float. Whoda thunk it with all that armor and stuff? Interesting.

My sermon from 6/29/08

In case you haven't already heard, I had the opportunity to give the sermon at our church on Sunday, June 29th. Since our pastor was in the middle of a series on giving, he asked me to speak in that area so as to continue the series while he was out of town for a week. So I thought, great, I get to give one of my first sermons, and I get to speak on the topic most pastors hate to talk about. Woohoo.

But, God gave me the words and the focus to put together a sermon that in all lasted about 45 minutes. Those who know me know I can be long-winded. This just proves it.

Tiffany has requested that I post the notes for my sermon on this blog. Really I don't know why, since she is the only one who reads it, and she heard the sermon, but hey, honor your wife. So, here's what I got (I've deleted the last story because I don't have the reference cited).

I. Introduction

A. Joke about the millionaire and the old woman

A church was having a time where the members were given the opportunity to give a testimony of how giving has affected their lives. One particular man, a millionaire, got up and spoke about the first time he gave to a ministry. “It was right after I earned my first dollar ever. We had a visiting missionary speak at our church and at the end he asked for donations for his ministry. Knowing that my choice was to either give my dollar to the missionary or keep it for myself, I knew that God wanted me to give the dollar. So I did, and it has changed my life.” The congregation applauded the man as he returned to his seat. Shortly after sitting, an elderly woman sitting behind him leaned forward and whispered to him. She said, “That was a very impressive story. I dare you to do it again.”

B. Comments on speaking about giving and speaking in general

I said this when I spoke here on Good Friday, and I’ll say it again today: two years of seminary has probably made me more nervous about speaking than no training at all would. It doesn’t help that I’m supposed to be talking on giving, a topic that most American pastors do not enjoy speaking about. Nonetheless, I am honored to have this opportunity and I pray that God will use this time.

I will say that I have learned a great deal in preparing for today, and much of what I will say here has been extremely convicting in my own life. Giving is not something that comes easily for many of us, especially when we consider that Christian giving includes so much more than just money. When we realize that we are to give of our time, talents, and treasures, we realize how little we truly give back to our Lord who provides for us.

Our text for today will be Philippians 4:10-20. This passage is the most extensive exhortation for giving in the New Testament.

C. Reading of Philippians 4:10-20

D. Presentation of topic

As I said, this is a long exhortation in which Paul expresses his gratitude for the gifts he received from the church in Philippi. This church, likely composed of both wealthy and poor believers, faced many difficulties of its own, as Paul encourages them to find joy in the face of opposition throughout this letter. Despite these difficulties, they made every effort to give to Paul’s ministry as he sought to bring the Gospel to the ends of the earth. We can learn a great deal from the Philippian church as they serve as a model of giving without asking any questions.

II. The Philippians gave without asking, “Why should I give?”

A. The Philippians had previous plans to give

The Philippians did not wait until they received a support letter from Paul or until he came and plead with them to give to his growing need. Rather, they had a history of giving to his ministry, as is indicated by his comments in verses 10 and 15-16. Instead of asking why they should give, as would be the reaction of so many today, they asked when they could give. They were more concerned about getting the opportunity to give than they were about whether or not to give. They had already decided to give, but they apparently had to wait for a period of time before sending their most recent gift. It seems that they already had a proper motivation for giving.

B. Why we should give

1. We should give because we belong to God

The next time we face the question “Why should I give,” we should take into consideration our position before God. First Corinthians 6:19-20 says “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.” As believers, we are not even our own possessions, but we belong entirely to God. By extension, if we cannot even lay claim to our own lives, how could we rightly cling tightly to any possession we may claim to have? That is, anything that we have actually belongs to God since we belong to Him. In fact, we are told numerous times in the Bible that everything that we have has been given to us by God, further indicating that it all belongs to Him.

Because God owns everything, He alone has the prerogative to determine how it should be distributed and used. Suppose, for example, that a friend allows you to borrow their car. It still belongs to them, but they have entrusted it to you and understand that you may use it for whatever you choose. The friend, however, can rightly put some restrictions on this use, such as requiring proper maintenance of the vehicle while it is in your possession. Furthermore, the friend can ask for you to return the car to them for whatever reason and you should do so. Likewise God has entrusted all that we have to us for our personal use and enjoyment, but He has every right to ask us to return these gifts to Him at any time. Sometime this can be extremely difficult to do, as we have become so attached to these gifts that we feel that we could not possibly live without them. Yet we must remember that God’s purposes can be summed up in one word: LOVE. This being true we can safely assume that He intends His wealth to be applied to the task of blessing other people.

2. We should give because we have received much

We can easily see God’s generosity toward us if we simply take the time to take stock of all of the blessings in our lives. Even if we have little or no money, those who have realized their sinfulness, understood that Christ died in our place so that our sins may be forgiven, and in turn placed their trust in Christ have become heirs of the Kingdom of God. This gift of eternal life with God is a greater blessing than anything we can accrue while alive on earth. Even if we may have little to show physically, our blessing and our treasures are in heaven and these alone are more than enough to be thankful for.

We have probably all heard that giving is the responsibility of the Christian. Our church is currently doing this series on giving to remind you of this, as difficult or enjoyable as it may be to listen to these messages. Yet we must realize that our responsibility is primarily as response. These two words are actually related, as “responsibility” is based off of “response.” Therefore, our responsibility to give should actually be a response to all that God has given us. Our giving should be an expression of joy and gratitude for the bounty of God’s goodness that He has poured out on our lives.

3. We should give because money matters to God

Money matters to God, but not in the sense that He needs it. God does not need money for His will to be done. But since God has chosen to work with man using human systems, money must be a consideration of His. About 15% of everything that Christ says in the Bible relates to money or possessions, more than His teachings on heaven and hell combined. Most of these teachings involve letting go of earthly possessions and using what we have to help others. When we minister, we must minister to the soul but also to the body. James 2:15-16 says, “If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, ‘Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,’ and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that?” The most important thing we can do with what we have, then, is to give it away for the benefit of those in need. This brings us to our second point.

III. The Philippians gave without asking, “What’s in it for me?

A. The Philippians did not seek personal recognition

We see it all the time nowadays. In an effort to show how much celebrities care, many are calling in the press to tell their stories as they give millions to various charities. Oprah had a television show this spring where she used her own money and told the contestants to give it away, all the while making her come off as some great hero. Yet this giving is not as honorable as the giving we see from the Philippians. Whereas modern celebrities give and expect to have their name attached to their gifts, the Philippians gave generously to Paul but did not seek recognition. As mentioned earlier, the church at Philippi most likely consisted of both rich and poor, yet their gift came from the church as a whole, and Paul wrote a letter specifically to them to thank them for this gift. This letter would have been originally delivered specifically to the church, so there would not have been the widespread recognition of their giving.

My mom served on a fundraising board for her church up in Illinois. This board had called in a professional fundraising consultant to help them determine the best way to raise money for a project they were planning to undergo. This consultant strongly encouraged the church to provide levels of recognition to correspond with the size of the gift given. Smaller gifts would be “bronze level,” medium gifts would be “silver level,” large gifts would be “gold level,” and huge gifts of thousands of dollars would be “platinum level.” To the frustration of my mom, many of the people on the board, including the pastors, thought this to be the best possible option. My mom, however, stood up and gave a speech that reminded the board that God blesses those who give sacrificially and without recognition. If they would encourage people to give with the promise of being recognized for their gifts, they would be encouraging them to give for the wrong reasons.

B. The need of others should have a moral bearing on our finances.

When I was growing up my teachers would remind us of the starving children in China if they ever saw food remaining on our tray at the end of lunchtime. Although this reminder has become more of a cliché nowadays and has therefore lost much of its impact, there is great truth in what they said. When we have an abundance of something (such as food), we take it for granted and willingly waste what we have. This can also be seen as we spend large sums of money on ourselves for things that we don’t really need, such as an ever-increasing wardrobe when so many in the world go without clothing. All of you probably have a greater understanding of the worldwide need than I do, as you have lived in places notorious for being some of the poorest nations in the world. The realization of the need of others both here and abroad should have a moral bearing on our finances.

There is little doubt that many here in the US have received great financial fortune, especially in comparison to much of the rest of the world. Although recent economic issues have made us feel the pinch more than before, and the cost of living is higher here than in other parts of the world, the fact remains that we are extremely wealthy in comparison to the rest of the world. The great need of others should in some way affect how we live and how we spend our money, as we should consider helping our brother or sister without expecting anything in return.

· The need of others should encourage us to live a simpler life

We do not necessarily need to live a SIMPLE life, but a simpler life than what may be expected by our peers. Our peers have an expectation of how we should live in relation to our income. According to them, if we make more, we should have a bigger house, a nicer car (and more of them), and buy name brand clothing. For Christians, however, the realization of the need of others should encourage us to live a simpler life than what the world expects. Paul states in verses 12 and 13 that he has learned how to live in the most modest of situations and be content. The joy of the Lord is more than enough for him to enjoy life, regardless of his situation. An excess of wealth should not be hoarded or spent frivolously while there is this obvious and ongoing need of other Christians globally. We must consider that any increased earning power that we have may produce an increased giving potential, not an increased living standard.

C. God blesses the gracious giver

We hear all the time that God will bless us as we give, which is indeed a promise that He has made. Yet we must realize that this blessing may not be in finances. Many preachers try to encourage the congregation to give more by claiming that God will essentially reimburse them for everything they gave and then some. Yet this raises a couple of questions. First, what about the large number of Christians who give generously and never see that money again? And, more than that, doesn’t this change the motivation for giving from responding the goodness of God to seeking to gain personal profit? Following the example of the Philippians, we should give for the advancement of the Gospel as a response to what God has done for us without seeking any special reward for doing so.

God does indeed promise to bless those who give graciously, yet this blessing may not be what we expect. Most often people expect to basically get their money back, and sometimes this is the case. But it seems that when God blesses these people with more money it should be used to bless others. The money that He has provided is not some special reward for good behavior, but another opportunity to give to others. It seems more common, however, that the blessings we receive for giving are not tangible at all. As indicated by Paul’s comment in verse 17, the blessing could be in souls won for Christ through the use of your gift. The promise of a blessing in reaching souls for eternity should be a greater motivation than making more money.

Sometimes the best examples to follow are children. Brother Matthias passed this story on to me a couple of weeks ago, and I thought it was very fitting for this series on giving. It tells of a little girl in Philadelphia. She sat, sobbing, near a small church she had just been turned away from because it was “too crowded.” “I can’t go to Sunday School,” she cried as the pastor walked by. Seeing her shabby appearance, the pastor had an idea why, took her by the hand, walked her into the Sunday School class, and sat her down in the front. She was so happy for this opportunity that she went home that night thinking of all the children in the world who have no place to worship Jesus. Two years passed and this little girl was found dead in one of the poor, run-down buildings in the neighborhood. Her parents called for the pastor to handle the arrangements, and as she was being moved he found a small, tattered red purse that she had been holding. Inside he found 57 cents and a note which read, “This is to help build the little church bigger so more children can go to Sunday School.” She had saved for two years to give this offering. At her funeral he told the story of this purse and the note, and word got out to the community. A local realtor donated a large plot of land on which to build a new church, and within five years donations had poured in to the sum of $250,000, which, in 1900, was a huge sum of money. The unselfish love of this girl had touched the lives of so many and has given innumerable people the opportunity to learn about and worship God. She gave because she realized the need, not expecting anything in return. And though her gift was small, it was great in the eyes of the Lord. Which brings us to our final point.

IV. The Philippians gave without asking, “How much should I give?”

Size does not matter. Part of what makes the life of giving so exhilarating is the realization that, when we hand our meager resources over to God, they assume a power out of all proportion to their earthly size and value. Little becomes much when it is sacrificed on the altar of faith and service to others.

The Philippians gave to Paul’s ministry without asking how much they should give. In fact, they gave without Paul even asking them to. And their gift was well-received and positively affected Paul’s ministry. And this happened on numerous occasions. Likewise, we should realize the opportunity to live and not worry about how much is the right amount.

A. We should give according to what we have

Nowhere does the Bible set an exact amount that is “right” to give. We all have different incomes and different events in our life that may affect how much we are able to give, so setting an arbitrary number, no matter how high or low, should be avoided. Rather, each individual should give according to their circumstances. This amount should be a significant amount of their income, and nobody should feel bad if the amount they give is small in comparison to others. As I mentioned before, many celebrities give huge sums of money to charities and make sure everybody knows what they have done. Another thing to realize is that this large sum of money may be only a small portion of what they have. One million dollars for a celebrity with over 100 million dollars would be like a middle class individual making around 100,000 dollars giving 1000 to a charity, or a person who only has 1000 dollars giving 10 dollars to charity. Sure, the number is big, but it’s only 1% of what they have.

B. Giving should become a habitual part of our lives

The Philippians gave on numerous occasions, indicating that this was a normal part of their lives. Likewise we should develop a lifestyle that includes regular giving.

1. It’s never too late to start

We should begin to develop this habit now. Many of us wait to give until our lot in life improves. For example, when we are in school it is difficult to consider giving anything when we are paying so much, even going into debt, to pay for school. Yet developing a habit of giving even a small amount in the hard times makes us more likely to give when have more. Those who do not start giving when they have little to give and claim that they need to wait till their lot improves will always seem to only have little to give or to be in a situation that needs to be better before they are comfortable giving. It’s best represented in the American mindset for “more.” We work hard to get more stuff, but when we get that stuff it’s not enough and we long for more. If we go into giving with the mindset that we can’t give until we are comfortable, we will never be comfortable enough to give. We must, therefore, try to establish the habit regardless of our current situation.

2. Choose an amount that affects your lifestyle

As you seek to establish a habit of giving, determine an amount that will affect your lifestyle – that you can feel. It may be small, but God desires sacrificial giving. Paul acknowledges the sacrificial nature of the gift from the Philippians in verse 18 and alludes to the sacrificial system of the Old Testament. The Israelites gave a substantial portion of what they had in praise of God. They joyously gave the best of what they had and got by with what they had left. So, too, as we develop a habit of giving we should learn to give a portion of what we have that will affect how we live. Maybe this means we have to buy generic brand groceries instead of name brand, or that we only go out to eat once per week or even once per month. The point is that our giving to the Lord is a sacrificial response to Him and His gifts.

3. Incorporate your giving as a definite part of your budget

Our gifts to God should be taken off the top, just like our taxes. I’m not going to say that you have to give from your net income rather than your gross income, or vice versa, but rather that you should take out your gift to God before you start to spend the money. The government takes money from us before we are able to spend it, and this bothers many of us. I personally have a hard time in this area, as I think I deserve what little is left after the government takes out the taxes. We should budget our giving just as we would budget our rent, utilities, groceries, etc., instead of considering it part of our disposable income that could vary from week to week depending on how much we have left to spend. We should give to God from our first fruits, not our remains. If God is a priority in our life, giving to Him should also be a priority.

V. Conclusion

A. Example story from Joshua

B. God has called us to be good stewards of that which He has given us, whether it be riches, talents, or even our lives. We should therefore cling to nothing with a tight fist, but be willing to give any and all of it for the glory of God and the advancement of His Word. It should not be too much to ask, then, for us to give in times of need and in times of plenty, for we should willingly give back to the Lord who has provided us with the greatest gift of all – eternal life for all who believe in Him.

So, that's it. Please be nice.

Sometimes it's just hard....

It's weird, but it seems that the most common conversation that I've been having lately has been about how difficult it is to follow God's calling. I have come to particularly enjoy the poster that shows the face of Jesus and has written across the bottom the words

"I never said it would be easy."

I can think of that poster every time that life seems tough, but I don't know that I ever really let it sink in.

Now don't get me wrong, life for me right now is not falling apart. I have a job. Actually, I have three(ish). I have a beautiful wife, parents that love me, and am not lacking in friends who care about me. By all appearances my life is good. Yet I find myself struggling to get through each day. I am exhausted. I can't seem to bring myself to get into the Word, or even to pray. It seems that the harder that life gets, the more difficult it is to turn to the very source of life, love, and energy that we have. The downward spiral continues, and all of a sudden you realize that you haven't done a quiet time in a month, opened your journal since before Christmas, or even posted a blog entry since February. You've been preoccupied, and life has passed you by.

I was talking with my friend the other day. We'll call her L.W. (Not that her anonymity needs to be kept, but because I didn't tell her I would write about her). She is passionate about heading overseas as a missionary, and she is basically in her last month of seminary. It seems as though she is so close to getting there. But all of a sudden the brakes seem to have been slammed. She has no job (the one she had was seasonal), her parents can no longer afford to help her financially, and debt is rapidly accruing. She's having to pay for school (the very school that she is attending to enter the ministry) with a credit card, and she has no clue how her rent or bills will be paid. In our conversation she said

"I really want to follow God's call for my life, but sometimes He makes it so hard."

It's as though He makes it too hard to follow Him. We may be willing, but sometimes it's as though He is trying to make us unwilling.

But that's just it. Sometimes following Him is hard. But then again, He's worth going through the hard times for. We are told in James 1 that perseverance in these trials produces endurance. These trials come from God as He prepares us for service. Entering the mission field will not be easy. Going to a completely foreign place, thousands of miles from family and friends, unable to communicate with the locals, incapable of stomaching the food that is served, and constantly facing some sort of opposition will not be easy. But if that is your calling, it is worth suffering through the hard times. It's not that He is trying to make us unwilling. I'd say that it's His way of proving to us that He is worth serving. Through it all, God ultimately seeks that His name be glorified.

Just look through the Psalms. There were times where the Psalmist was greatly suffering, even angry at God. Yet even the Psalms of lament end with resounding praise because God - the God that we have the opportunity to serve - is faithful. So we praise God, even when it's hard.

And sometimes it's hard.

Remember when?

So, remember when we were younger and turned papers in to teachers in hard copy? Like we would print off (or, even better, handwrite) our papers and deliver them to the teachers in person. Well, that just doesn't work anymore. We need to save the trees. It just takes too much paper to print off all these reports and turn them in that way. No, now we turn them in online. Two of my professors have special programs where course materials are distributed and turned in on a website while some of my other professors have asked that we turn in papers via email. So, I'm learning to trust that when I send an email containing my highly developed and researched thesis, the professor gets it "on time." Which brings up another issue. From my experience in receiving emails, sometimes there is a delay between when it is sent and when they arrive. I know, it shouldn't happen, but it does. Since professors who desire the work to be turned in electronically determine whether or not an assignment is late based on the time stamp in the received memo, if there is any delay papers that were legitimately completed and submitted on time can be marked as late. But, that's another issue.

So, why am I writing about this? Well, for one I'm bored after completing and turning in a paper this way. For another, I am sitting on the third floor of the library. A library that is full of books, all of which contain paper - often quite a bit of it. Many of these books are actually papers turned in by former students. Turned in as a hard copy, mind you. Not electronically.

Not that any of this is important. We are in a new age (not the New Age, that cult that I wrote a paper about last semester and turned in - in hard copy), and things are good. We are blessed to have the technology that we have, and we are doing good for the environment by killing less trees. Too bad the exhaust from the car that I drive will be killing enough other things to make up for it...

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Seasons? Anyone? Seasons?

Dallas lacks this thing called "seasons". Well, not entirely. We really have a good grasp on summer. And there is a little bit of spring (that's when it's only in the 60s or 70s). The seasons we really lack are fall and winter. "Fall" is basically the sudden 40 degree drop that we experience at night, usually indicating that the next day will be warmer than the one before (go figure). "Winter" is if that 40 degree drop brings a colder day the next day. Sometimes white pellets fall from the sky. These crazy southerners call this stuff "snow," freak out, and close down the city. No joke. It happened during the crazy "Winter Blast '07" where it was a chilling 30 degrees during about 2 days with ice (yes ice) on some of the roads. All schools closed, most businesses closed, and regular television programming was pushed to the side so that the weathermen could broadcast all day. It's a good thing they warned us...I mean, we almost froze. And those roads, way too dangerous to consider driving. It was much better for us to crawl into our little holes, crank the heat up, and pray that it wasn't the beginning of the apocalypse.

But that was last year. This year cold is a completely foreign concept. "Cold" happens overnight and burns away with the sun. Or, "cold" could also refer to that illness that everybody has because the temperature fluctuates so drastically overnight. Currently it is February 9th and 70 degrees outside. That's right. 70. I have been walking around outside in shorts and a t-shirt in February - and sweating. This, I would argue, is more likely a sign of the end times than the "Winter Blast" of last year. But, then, I like seasons.

Maybe this is God's way of preparing me for Africa...

A Jobless Blessing

I am tired. That's a given. If you see me around and ask me how I am doing, 9 times out of 10 I'll respond with "I'm sooooo tired" (the length of "so" varies--that's how to determine how bad it is). Long days at school followed by long nights at work really begin to wear on the body, especially when the "days off" that get scheduled are spent fulfilling church duties. Many people ask me when I see my wife, to which I have a number of responses.

1) I saw her on Tuesday. That's date night. We see each other every Tuesday. (Usually it's a home-cooked meal - like frozen pizza - and a movie, but this past Tuesday was chicken Parmesan and a walk through Northpark Mall)

2) After I get home from work I see her sleeping. And then when I wake up and go to school I again see her sleeping. I see her. She doesn't necessarily know that I see her, but I do. This is usually my more cynical response.

3) Never. Sometimes honesty is all I have the energy for.

Lately, however, I have another answer that I can give. I see Tiffany on campus or on the days that I don't have class when I stay at home. I guess that's what happens when the bread-winner of the family is temporarily jobless.

Yes, she's the bread-winner. Full-time student status and a less-than-exciting job at Starbucks only creates more bills. It doesn't pay them. So we've relied on Tiffany's many talents to keep us afloat. (As a side note, we truly rely on God, for we know that every blessing comes from Him. These blessings include the multiplicity of talents that He has given Tiffany as well as the way she has profited from her use of said talents.)

Yes, she is temporarily jobless. It happens. Massive layoffs happen. They just do. And sometimes they happen to the people we love. So, Tiff is jobless. But she's also extremely talented (see above) and assertive. She will find a job. There's no doubt in our minds. So, she is temporarily jobless.

That said, I have gotten to see my wife at random times and enjoy things that we have never before been able to share. It wasn't until she lost her job that she was able to attend a class with me (Soteriology with Dr. Holsteen - good times), and today she came down to campus and went to her first chapel. Last week we had lunch together in the cafeteria (really romantic), and when I had a class canceled due to illness (ironically Soteriology with Dr. Holsteen) I went home for the day to find Tiffany not doing a whole lot. Though I was worthless, I got to see her.

All this to say, sometimes unfortunate times can also be blessings. It is not fun when she doesn't have a job. It wasn't the last time, and it's not this time. But God has proven faithful before, and we have more faith than ever that He will do something amazing here too. But I get to see my wife when I otherwise would never really see her anymore. To through the unfortunate circumstances we have found great blessing. And we praise God - even in this storm.

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